


A Blogger's Advice

by ThatFilmGraduate



Series: A PostSecret Collection [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A PostSecret Collection, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Blogger Lily Evans, Confessions, Established James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Established Relationship, F/M, Nosy James Potter, PostSecret, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 09:07:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24847297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatFilmGraduate/pseuds/ThatFilmGraduate
Summary: 'You think I'm reading your mind… but really, I'm just reading your blog.'James Potter has a dirty secret and it's time to let it out.James/Lily.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Series: A PostSecret Collection [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1613362
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	A Blogger's Advice

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: I do not any of these HP characters or settings. Nor do I own any of the quotes or television shows referenced in the story. 
> 
> Written: January 2017  
> Rewritten: May 2020

**You think I'm reading your mind… but really, I'm just reading your blog.**

The Boho Café is a niche establishment in the centre of town, small but popular amongst the university students. It has brick walls and comfortable driftwood furniture and colourful (often abstract) artwork from local artists hanging up on the walls. The internet connection is always banging, and the staff are always very friendly. It is a nice place, if a bit pretentious.

James Potter is currently sitting at one of the tables in the café, sipping a cappuccino and watching his girlfriend of three years as she taps away at her laptop, happy and oblivious to his inner turmoil. What inner turmoil, you may ask. Well, James is feeling a bit anxious and a lot guilty because he has been keeping secrets from the woman he loves and he hates it. He hates keeping secrets in general, but he especially hates keeping Lily Evans, his emerald-eyed goddess, in the dark.

At present, James is wondering whether to confess his dirty secret or not.

His dirty secret being that he reads Flowers and Pots, an online blog written by Lily Evans.

Lily writes about everything on there. She writes about university life and her struggles. She writes about her mental health and her friendships. She writes about her family and her relationship with James. It is, by all accounts, a very popular blog. James has been reading it for months (over a year, actually) and he has been feeling guilty for just as long because she doesn't know that he reads it – or that he even knows about it.

And he is currently wondering whether he should confess or not.

On one side of the coin, he knows that he can't keep it hidden forever. He is bad at keeping secrets and Lily always seems to know when he's lying. He knows that it is bound to come out at some point. Really, it is only a matter of time before he slips up and reveals his errors. Plus, they are getting married soon and he wants to go into their marriage with no barriers between them.

On the other side of the coin, however, James knows his fiancée and he knows that she will probably go mental when she finds out what he has done. He knows that he will be in deep shit and he doesn't really want to face the consequences quite yet because Lily Evans can be a manipulative bitch when she wants to be and her punishments tend to boarder on torturous. She will either give him the cold shoulder or the incessant-talking treatment or she will tease him until he is so sexually frustrated that he cracks and begs forgiveness. She tends to win most of their arguments.

He doesn't know what to do. He knows what he **should** do, of course, but he knows where that path leads and he's not too fond of the end destination. But then... he's been feeling guilty for a while now and he'd rather not feel that way anymore.

James is also feeling a bit annoyed with himself too because he shouldn't be feeling so stressed when it isn't even his fault! If anything, it is Peter's fault for finding the blog in the first place. Or it is Remus's fault for knowing about it and keeping it quiet the whole time. Or it is Sirius's fault for reading it and taunting him about it and then showing him it and getting him addicted to it. Or maybe it is Lily's fault for writing it in the first place!

Regardless of whose fault it is, he feels guilty and he knows that he should because he could have told her that he knew or he could have stopped reading it at any point but he didn't. Instead, he got addicted.

James had been able to handle the guilt before because the rewards had always far outweighed his trepidation. But things have been different recently. It might be the way Lily has been acting lately or the impending wedding looming over them, but he doesn't think he can handle it anymore.

He probably would have been able to keep it hidden for a little while longer but then he had bought his future wife a caramel Frappuccino and she had made him feel like the shittiest person on earth when she had said: 'Oh, thanks, Sweetie. You're amazing, you know that? It's like you read my mind sometimes, honestly.' And then she had continued tapping away whilst James's demons, commonly known as Stress and Shame, came scratching at his insides. She had been praising him more and more recently, and it was beginning to gnaw at his conscience.

James sighs silently and puts his cappuccino on the table.

He knows what he has to do. He hasn't really got a choice. He can't keep it hidden anymore. The stress is weighing him down and they are going to be married in mere months and he really can't deal with the extra anxiety. And he can't keep hiding in the bathroom at three o'clock in the morning, reading her words and worrying that she is going to pop out of the bathtub and scream, 'Aha!'

He just can't.

It is either tell her now or in a few months and he knows that the longer he keeps quiet, the worse it is going to be when it eventually comes out. So with that in mind, he prepares to meet his fate and accept his punishment.

"Lil, I need to tell you something," he says, his palms beginning to sweat. (He's glad he put his coffee down because he's pretty sure the sweat would have made him drop the cup on himself.) "It's pretty important," he adds.

"Oh, that sounds ominous," Lily jokes, emerald eyes still attached to her computer screen as she taps away diligently.

James shifts in his chair and watches as she takes a sip of her drink – the same drink that has made him want to confess all. Their relationship is strong. He knows this. People are always commenting on how good they are together and how perfect they are for each other. But he knows that the next words out of his mouth are quite possibly going to lose him sex for the next few weeks – depending on how long Lily can last without. He doesn't want to say it, but he knows that he must.

"It's just..." He hesitates and Lily finally looks away from her screen, her eyes trained on him curiously. He pushes his glasses up his nose nervously and continues, "Well, you might be pretty pissed off. When you find out, I mean."

Lily stares at him for a long second, her eyes searching him for answers, trying to decide whether he is being serious or not. He can't blame her scepticism, really. After all, he has told her many times that he has something very important to tell her and it has never been important.

After a second, her joking smile turns into an intrigued one and she says, "Well, now I'm interested." She takes another sip of her iced coffee before she turns in her chair to face him fully. She then waves a hand and adds, "Go on."

"Alright," James nods and clears his throat, "Okay, um..." He takes a breath and turns to face her fully as well. "Right. Okay. Well—"

"James," Lily cuts in. "Get on with it."

James nods again and says, "Alright, well, you remember when we first got together and it – well, it wasn't going brilliantly because I kept getting things wrong? You were always angry with me because I was..."

"A bit of a prick?" Lily suggests.

"Right," James agrees, because he was a bit of a prick in the beginning – even he can admit that. "Well, last year, you said something had changed. That I was... nicer; more considerate."

Lily laughs and says, "Yes, because you had changed. You've been a lot more attentive recently. Ever since you proposed, actually. It's a nice change. Why?"

James grins crookedly and takes her hand in his own, "Listen, I'm about to tell you something really bad, but you have to remember that I did it because I love you. And you're amazing."

Lily raises an eyebrow but says nothing.

James takes a deep breath and continues, "Well, a while ago, we had a fight because I said something about your sister that you didn't like."

"You called her a horse-faced bitch and her husband a walrus," Lily reminds, unimpressed. "I may not get along with her sometimes, but she is still my sister."

"Right – and I'm sorry about that," James repeats. "But, listen, this isn't about that. I was ranting to my mates about our argument and I was fuming because you said that I didn't know you, and Pete... well, he found this blog."

Lily's eyebrow twitches but she doesn't speak.

"I swear, Lil, in the beginning, I thought it was just some random blog with relationship advice on it," James insists because it is the truth. "Pete didn't tell me who had written it. I don't think he even knew himself. Anyway, I read it and the advice... well, it worked. We made up and everything was good again. And then about a week later, Remus told us that it was your blog. I stopped reading it after that!"

Lily narrows her eyes and nods for him to continue.

"But then... Sirius told me that there was a new post and that it mentioned me. He kept reading it and alluding to it and I just... sort of... read it too. And then I kept reading it and... And it was your blog."

"You read my blog..." Lily mutters, voice steady and face neutral.

"Yeah," he nods in response before he adds, "I tried to stay away from it – I really did, Lil – but it helped me to understand you more and it was improving our relationship and it's really bloody addictive and you're a talented writer, so it's not really my fault that we read it every week."

"We?" Lily repeats. "Sorry, but who is 'we'?"

"Oh, well, me and the others," James answers, hazel eyes on their joined hands. "Remus has been reading it since the beginning apparently but when Sirius and Pete found it, they wouldn't stop, so we just figured we'd all read it together and then... you know... discuss it."

Lily hums distantly, her face still devoid of expression that it scares James a little. James takes a deep breath and prepares to hammer the final nail into his No-Sex-Until-The-Wedding coffin. He closes his eyes in apprehension and says:

"Earlier you said it was like I was reading your mind, but I wasn't. You see, you think that I'm reading your mind... but really, I'm just reading your blog." He grimaces and quickly adds, "It's taught me so much, please don't be angry with me."

The silence that follows his confession is unholy. It feels like the entire café has gone silent, but coffees are still being made and people are still chattering away and no one is paying even the slightest bit of attention to them. James can hear a distant buzzing in his ears and he desperately wants Lily to say something because she has not spoken for too many minutes (or hours – he really doesn't know how long it has been at this point).

Then he hears it: a snort, and then a giggle, and then a full-on belly laugh.

James cautiously opens his eyes to find his fiancée sitting there with amusement written all over her beautiful face. Her emerald eyes sparkle gorgeously, her perfect smile is honest and wide, and he doesn't know why she isn't shouting at him – but he has learned not to look a horse in the mouth... or something like that, so he smiles back and wonders distantly if she is having a nervous breakdown.

Her reaction has thoroughly confused him because he has just admitted to invading her privacy and using her advice to make him seem like the perfect boyfriend and she seems... happy about it? Lily has always been a bit strange, but this reaction has put her onto another level of weird altogether.

"Oh, James, you ignorant slut," Lily laughs. "I know."

James ignores the insult (because it is a quote from one of their favourite television shows and he knows that she is not actually calling him a slut) and asks, "Huh?"

"I know," she repeats. "I've known for months. Why do you think I wrote all that stuff about our second anniversary?"

James shakes his head, utterly confused.

"Because I knew you'd up your game," she explains. "And you did. Our dates after that were beyond magical – hell, you proposed a few months later!"

"But... How did you find out?" James asks, because he had been so careful.

Lily takes a sip of her drink before she answers, "Pete let it slip ages ago. We were all drinking at Sirius's flat and you had passed out on Sirius's bed, Remus was in the kitchen 'cooking pasta' with Sirius, and Pete and I were in the living room playing Truth or Dare with Marlene and Dorcas. I had my suspicions – no one becomes as generous as you did overnight – so I asked him, and he had to tell me."

"You've known all this time?" he asks.

"I have," she confirms, turning to face her laptop again, her fingers flying over the keypad. "Honestly, James, you underestimate me too often. Look, I am sorry that I didn't tell you, but in my defence, you have been the perfect boyfriend and I think you've learned a thing or two about how to treat me."

James splutters because his beautiful, fierce, independent fiancée is just as deviant as himself. He did not think it was possible to love her more but apparently he was wrong.

"Well... what do we do now?" he asks, unsure.

Lily smiles and places her hand on his as she says, "How about this: I keep writing, you keep reading, I will pretend that I don't know, and you will continue to heed my advice. That sound good?"

James takes a second to study his fiancée because it sounds like a trap. Then Lily adds:

"It's not a trap, James. This deal is advantageous for both of us."

James considers this and realises two things: Lily is not mad at him, so he is not going to be punished for his misbehaviour; and this is a good deal because it means he can keep getting to know his fiancée on a different level whilst improving himself. He nods eagerly and presses a kiss to her hand.

"You're amazing," he says.

Lily grins and replies, "I know," before she turns back to her laptop and begins tapping away again.

James sits back in his chair and studies his future wife, wondering how he has managed to reveal his dirtiest secret without incurring any consequences. Lily did not think he was reading her mind, because she knew he was reading her blog.

As he sits and stares and thinks, he decides that reading that blog and marrying Lily Evans are two of the best decisions of his thus-far short life.


End file.
